Reddit How to Do Cpr Funny

On misery x cpr, even if it is satire, it's not funny.

This is the correct way to start CPR funny memes

Funny i learnt how to do CPR from YouTube

Funny CPR video reaction

Can we get d-r Mike to react to Jason's video on CPR. The Fire department chronicles is also a great channel btw. Link to the video in question https://youtu.be/4u69rGzWmcQ. Stay safe yall.

Lol CPR funny

Last year I had to get my CPR certification. Couldn't find the original video I watched, but this is almost as funny youtube.com/watch?v=soq9C…

Funny Version of CPR

You know like, how another one bites the dust is a good song for CPR? Yea I thought it would be funny if someone just played that when someone else is having a SHEER heart attack then everyone is dancing. Idk

CPR for the 21st Century (x-post r/funny)

While they were ridiculous(ly funny) scenes, thanks to The Office, I know to check the temperature of door handles in case of fire and the rate at which to perform CPR.

Saw this on r/funny. CPR in Thailand

CPR scene is funny and all

But I've never heard of it actually helping save someone's life. /s #enoughalready

It's funny how club penguin rewritten is called "CPR" for short

PsBattle: Guy posing as Robert Pattinson with CPR dummy (X-post /r/funny)

Funny how CPR works when you exhale CO2

New CPR Instructions. [x-post via r/funny]

Animal CPR (X-post from r/funny)

A redditor's take on CPR [xpost from funny]

I survived Cardiac Arrest this year and it is amazing how many memories I have in League..

I've been playing since around 2014. My wife got me playing because I was a few years out from playing WOW and I really didn't play any games at all at that time. So I started playing Dominion and ARAM and SR with her and god I hated that game, but I played it.

I used to main Soraka Mid with her old Starcall. Man that was fun.

But this last Sept 11th, which is also my bday, I suffered Cardiac Arrest at home in bed while sleeping at around 11pm. My wife was supposed to be at work as she works 3rd shift and she had the night off for a random reason. She wasn't supposed to be home. Long story short she saved my life. Surviving Cardiac Arrest under the conditions I was under is like 6.8% or something. I was put into a drug induced coma for 11 days where they cooled me down. They were positive that when they took me off assisted breathing that I wouldn't survive. They had my wife ready that I was for sure braindead.

Welp, here I am. I have an ICD in me that will shock my heart if it happens again. This morning I was playing aram and it reminded me that when my wife and I were talking we realized how many funny memories we had in ARAM and Poro King ARAM. Or when One For All was new.

As a dating couple and a married couple we have had years of memories in League. I know it's just a game and it doesn't hold a candle to real life but we talked about other players. It is just a game but it's been a very entertaining part of my life over the past few years.

Idk why I'm telling you all this. Processing what happened is hard. I'm not an old man just sometimes your heart goes NOPE and then your wife has to shatter your breastplate to give you life saving CPR because you are dying no matter how young you are.

But I get to still log in and play ARAM this morning. And my wife has the day off so we'll get to play ARAM later together.

I can't wait to see you guys out there on the bridge of Memes. This post isn't supposed to be depressing it was me just talking with you guys. Some of y'all are crazy af but that's okay.

Edit: Hey, some of these questions are hard to answer. I hope you understand that. Reliving it is hard and makes my mind go nuts. Y'all are awesome and I'll answer when I can. Just a lot going on upstairs in the ole brain when this subject is front and center.

Is there a doctor in the house?

TIFU by blasting cupcakke next to my mom

So tifu by blasting cpr next to my conservative Christian mom…

For some background info, I am 15f and I live in a very christian household. We go to church every Sunday and my grandmother is a pastor and all that jazz. Ironically enough my mom really does not monitor what I do on the internet at all, and even when I let her log into my personal emails for making accounts and such she doesn't snoop through at all. I also like to blast podcasts on full volume while folding clothes (this is be important later). Anyways, on to the actual story:

As all teenager girls have these days, I have tiktok. I don't know what my mom thinks tiktok is but she seems to think it's just for funny jokes & art and is not aware of the world of not so child friendly things on there. Either way I usually stay off tiktok around her because my fyp is usually filled with cupcakke songs in the background and slightly inappropriate jokes that would get me crucified around her. One day I felt pretty confident and calm so I made the bold bold decision of opening and watching tiktok basically next to her (one seat apart). I open up tiktok and the first thing that pops up is someone dancing to cpr by cupcakke…

I immediately try to turn it down and apologize to my mom saying I don't know why the song is so explicit (which I mean is a obvious lie lol) and that I'm sure it'll be reported and taken down soon. I immediately realize it was so loud because of the sole reason of me folding my clothes earlier while listening to music and forgetting to turn it back down like I've done previously. My mom doesn't make any scene at that moment, but lately she's been more… watching? Like now I have my headphones in to avoid the same problem, and she often gets up to 'blow her nose' which is just an excuse to see what I'm watching. Maybe I shouldn't be listening to explicit songs but either way I guess this is a goodbye to the loving freedom on the internet I had before

tl;dr: Opened an app near my mom in a moment of confidence accidentally blasted CPR full volume due to my forgetfulness

SERIOUS: This subreddit needs to understand what a "dad joke" really means.

I don't want to step on anybody's toes here, but the amount of non-dad jokes here in this subreddit really annoys me. First of all, dad jokes CAN be NSFW, it clearly says so in the sub rules. Secondly, it doesn't automatically make it a dad joke if it's from a conversation between you and your child. Most importantly, the jokes that your CHILDREN tell YOU are not dad jokes. The point of a dad joke is that it's so cheesy only a dad who's trying to be funny would make such a joke. That's it. They are stupid plays on words, lame puns and so on. There has to be a clever pun or wordplay for it to be considered a dad joke.

Again, to all the fellow dads, I apologise if I'm sounding too harsh. But I just needed to get it off my chest.

I cancelled pet ins last month to save some money after our boy made it to his 1st birthday without incident. Tonight, he went in for potentially $8K in surgery costs!

EDIT/UPDATE: he is home! drugged out of his mind and VERY cuddly. we are ready to manage his recovery like champs and so, so, so happy he is eating and smiling again. ❤ it wasn't one of my socks! by the way! It was a 2" piece of foam floor mat we didn't think he actually ate, out of the trash can of the grooming suite we use, about 3 weeks ago now! 🤦🏽‍♀️

I feel like the headline says it all. LOL.

We are incredibly fortunate that we have had the opportunity to save an emergency fund, and will likely qualify for Care Credit to prevent wiping it all out at once, but if he meets the high end of the estimate, it will almost definitely delay our plans to start looking at houses with yards for them this summer, and it's incredibly frustrating to know that had this happened 11 days earlier, we would be looking at about $1500 + the year of premiums ($600) vs $8000.

I'll share more about his story because lord knows we spent all day on Reddit reading other pups' accounts to feel out what to do with him.

Our little man started presenting Friday AM with some light retching / vomiting. He's a poodle and poodles have the finickiest stomachs known to man, so this isn't really groundbreaking. We keep an eye on him and he only ate about half his lunch but continued drinking water. Still within normal range for him. Where we really start to get concerned is that towards 5-7pm, he becomes glued to the couch. He's lazy to begin with, but he cannot even be bothered to play with his "sister" for more than a minute or two. We can feel some gas in his stomach and he seems nauseous but we're fairly certain it's not bloat, because he can get bile out of one end and normal BM out of the other, so we give him some simethicone and take turns watching him overnight.

Saturday AM, he wakes us up with a lovely, quite sizeable vomit of mostly bile and water, and is continually lethargic. He goes outside with partner and I'm told he has some truly impressive projectile diarrhea, again, mostly liquid/bile. At this point, he's not taking interest in either food or water and while responsive, is glued to the couch. We take him into his normal vet, and they do a negative giardia test, x-rays, fluids, and surprise, he has an ear infection (also super common for poodles) - we are up to about $450, but they tell us they feel he is stable, they don't see an obvious obstruction, so we are probably OK to keep him until Monday as long as he doesn't start vomiting, because they were able to

... keep reading on reddit ➡

Blind Girl Here. Give Me Your Best Blind Jokes!

Do your worst!

This subreddit is 10 years old now.

I'm surprised it hasn't decade.

French fries weren't cooked in France.

They were cooked in Greece.

You've been hit by

Dropped my best ever dad joke & no one was around to hear it

For context I'm a Refuse Driver (Garbage man) & today I was on food waste. After I'd tipped I was checking the wagon for any defects when I spotted a lone pea balanced on the lifts.

I said "hey look, an escaPEA"

No one near me but it didn't half make me laugh for a good hour or so!

Edit: I can't believe how much this has blown up. Thank you everyone I've had a blast reading through the replies 😂

What starts with a W and ends with a T

It really does, I swear!

Some days are easier than others.

Another day that I wake up, moody and numb. Last May 2021 something that I wasn't really ready for happened. I was on my computer reading the news ( what a horrific year) but then I switched to reading memes and funny stuff to laugh a bit. I remember I found something funny and I had the urge to share it with someone, I always do that. So I went to my parents home and when I entered the living room, it was empty so I look around, I call my mom but my sister answeres. She says: come mom isn't feeling good. My sister was showering my mom; getting her ready to take her to the hospital. When I arrived my mom was still conscious but she was staring into the ceiling. I said get her some clothes let's go. When my sister left, my mom closed her eyes so I panicked; I was begging my mom; please stay with us. She wasn't responding and what I feared the most was happening. I tried to check if she was breathing or check if her heart was still beating but all I could hear was silence. I tried the best I could to perform a CPR but nothing. When my sister screamed I realized that my mom was gone. My mom died between my arms.

If your mom is still alive, I beg you to go kiss her and hug her as much as you can because the clock is ticking and you will thank me someday.

I hope I made my mom proud and I hope I will never disappoint her. She will always be with me and I will always honor her memory.

I love you mom, you know I did.

Why did Karen press Ctrl+Shift+Delete?

Because she wanted to see the task manager.

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Source: https://punstoppable.com/funny-cpr-puns

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